Shit I Believe (One)

One thing I’ve noticed as I’ve expanded my understanding of this whole blogging experience is that there are a lot of people out there who like to offer up their personal beliefs through this medium.  I’d say that’s probably a good way to do it, since people seem to be comfortable with making personal consumption choices on the internet (but surprisingly can’t seem to exercise that same judgement with a TV remote in hand).  After experiencing some of this vast ocean of belief out there both intentionally and unintentionally, I thought to myself, “Well, what the hell, might make a good recurring blog topic.”  And so here we are.  As the conventional wisdom goes: “Opinions are like assholes; everyone has one and they all stink.”

I believe…

… that getting into fights is sometimes unavoidable because even if you really are a tough guy, eventually someone will try calling your bluff.

… a lot of people forget that we have two ears but only one mouth, and that the relative proportion suggests relative levels of use.

… that other than what it says in the Constitution, you’re entitled to opportunity and that’s about it.

… that children are equipped with a Reset Button located in the butt, and that frequent use early on will prevent software programming corruption later.

… that Microsoft intentionally made Solitaire more difficult just to piss off me and me alone.

… respect comes in two forms: that which is given, and that which is earned. How much you wind up with and in what proportion is up to you.

… the fact that an automobile has only one steering wheel and set of pedals imply something very important to the passenger(s).

… that it is infinitely more difficult to move from lax standards to disciplined ones than it is the other way around.

… bacon is the most awesome form of meat on the planet.

… the laws of physics clearly demonstrate that the amount of energy required to lower the toilet seat is equal to that required to raise it.

… that you’re as fully entitled to worship who- or whatever you damn well like as I am entitled to not have to listen to you talk about it, so please get off my porch.

… I will have another beer.

I have a feeling this might piss off the neighbors, as a friend of mine once said.  I’ll keep a steady watch on my “give a shit meter” and let you all know if I tick up off of zero. This post turned out kinda ranty, but that’s ok because the feedback I get tells me I’m fairly good at it.