Rants Makes Up Feels

Every now and then I come across something that’s so absolutely inspirational that I am compelled to act. Today, my good friend and future overly-polite (he’s Canadian) houseguest, Archon,

Rantionary: “J” Is For…

I am painfully off of my posting game in general, and grossly overdue for another iteration of the ever-popular Rantionary.  I blame the Army and the window-licker moving company that has yet to find all of my shit.  I’ll leave that rant for another

Rantionary: “I” Is For…

Good morning, Awesome Rants Army Readerhood!  Yeah, I said good morning so you know my shit is fake.  In social situations, I always just say, “Morning,” through gritted teeth as if stating the fact that it is morning.  I rarely see much good about the fact.  I’ve made sure my duty is done and ensured the Sun

Rantionary: “H” Is For…

After the second Reader-Sourced Rantionary installment you all had to know the next hellacious letter in my twisted, fictional alphabet was due to drop like a

Rantionary: Reader-Provided Words Part 2

Hey! Wake up! It’s time for another installment of Reader-Provided Rantionary® Words!  Today, friends, neighbors and Cañadians (because mainly that’s who reads me according to my stats), I’m dropping

Rantionary: “G” Is For…

Yet another installment of my ongoing explainer/dictionary of creative ways to employ or destroy the English language. By now you’ve likely noted that some of these terms appear in regular dictionaries. Then again, if you’re smart enough to notice that shit, you’re also bright enough to realize I rarely feel obliged to adhere to those and therefore

Rantionary: “F” Is For…

I am quite certain that is particular section of the Rantionary is of particular interest to everyone out there who subjects themselves to my posts each day, and for obvious reasons. The letter F is clearly a gold mine of Rantalicious words, all of them unfit for use in even impolite company, and some of which could get your ass beat down hard when used in bars frequented

Rantionary: Reader-Provided Words #1

The whole Rantionary concept has really taken off.  In the tradition of my string of “That Guy” posts, where I elected to take fan-based suggestions and expound on them, I’ve thrown open the Rants tome of vile, naughty and off-color words to the ‘Notes’ page and left the pen resting on the parchment for all y’all.  Here are

Rantionary: “E” Is For…

In this ongoing series of posts that highlight the more colorful ways I wield – or bludgeon – the English language, I’ve come to the realization that this process of creating these is a lot like going to your basement (or attic, as the case may be) and randomly sifting through the boxes of useless shit you have stashed there. You know what I mean – you spot a box and open it, and an hour later you are asking yourself

Rantionary: “D” Is For…

Trying to knock down at least four pins this time, and extend the gay sports analogy lead-ins. Today’s selected letter of course is D, and I have to say that after considering the possibilities for X, Q, and Z while keeping in mind my limited brain function, this may well take on two parts and make up for failure where