Archive for the Humor Category

Shit I’ve Said Out Loud #11

Posted in Awesome, Humor, Official Shit I Said Out Loud, Random with tags , , , , , , , , on August 22, 2016 by BrainRants

I went and searched for the last edition of Shit I’ve Said Out Loud (which would be Number 10) and discovered that I posted that turd in 2015.  Wow.  I noticed that I’m accumulating awesome out-loud sayings at a much reduced rate.  I think this is due to Continue reading

How To Drive Like A Virginian

Posted in Humor, Rant with tags , , , , , , , , , on August 11, 2016 by BrainRants

An entire fucking year ago I shat a post about the joys of living in Virginia.  Another blogger asked about the state slogan, ‘Virginia is for lovers.’  I say: bullfuckingshit.  Lovers might be here, but they’re obviously Continue reading

Where Is Rants?

Posted in Awesome, Family, Fiction, Humor, Random, Rant, Writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 8, 2016 by BrainRants

Pardon me while I type and eat some Burrito Lasagna, courtesy of my wife, the tiny lady who’s devoting her life to making me epic fat.  Because my portion control issue Continue reading

Retardidment: The Job Hunt

Posted in Army, Awesome, Economy, Family, Humor, Rant with tags , , , , , , on January 18, 2016 by BrainRants

Here we go again with the bitter Rantings® of a man forced to stop doing the one job he loved and actually could do without serious consequences.  Yeah, that’s me, BrainRants®.  I’m tired of linking more than three times to previous posts, so I made a whole new RantsPage® to collect this assemblage of awesomehood. Continue reading

Retardidment: The Medical Shit

Posted in Army, Humor, Rant with tags , , , , , , , , on November 29, 2015 by BrainRants

Yes, I’m still alive.  Some of you lame songwriter hopefuls might be disappointed in this news, but there you go.  I’ve given you two posts Continue reading

Retardidment: The Army Shit

Posted in Army, Humor, Rant with tags , , , , , , , , , , on November 13, 2015 by BrainRants

I mentioned here recently that I’m retiring from the military.  I promised to write something entertaining about the three big muscle movements involved, and “Army Shit” is the first.  Before I dive into that Continue reading

Retardidment

Posted in Army, Humor, Rant with tags , , , , , , , , , on October 23, 2015 by BrainRants

I’ve obviously not been posting regularly, even on Long Awkward Pause where I collaborate and contribute.  I’m just about in hot water with them over that but I think I’m dog paddling very well. Continue reading

A Great Debate Question

Posted in Awesome, Humor, Politics, Random with tags , , , , , , , , on September 17, 2015 by BrainRants

In light of the ongoing stupidity of election debates, staged so that we can pick the least-worst pudknocker to lead us Continue reading

Dreams Do Come True

Posted in Awesome, Humor with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 2, 2015 by BrainRants

You might have seen recent news about something really cool.  No, I’m not referring to Trump’s latest stupid verbal fart that notched his dumb ass up a point in polls.  I’m talking about Continue reading

The Sweet Taste of Shit

Posted in Awesome, Home, Humor, Rant with tags , , , , , , , on July 24, 2015 by BrainRants

Stand back, because this is the kind of thing that truly – truly – can only happen to me.  You actually might want to sit down.  Ready?  I can wait, because Continue reading