Rantswers® 9.0

Hello, good morning.  Or, as I prefer to say, “Morning.”  Most – not all – of my mornings usually suck ass, therefore my method of greeting.  Odd that those correspond almost one-to-one on Mondays through Fridays.  Perhaps it’s something to do with waking my corpse up at four o’ clock in the morning.  No matter if I’m sleeping or not, it’s time for the first 2015 edition of Rantswers®, because all y’all (plural form of y’all) love Rantswers®.

Aaaaugghhh!

Aaaaugghhh!

A quick review of the rules:

* You see this post, are aroused (or bored), and want some humorous abuse from me. Perhaps you have a serious question, either type or both is fine.

* You scroll on down and post your question using the comment feature.

* Rants (uhm, me) reads and swings for the fence when he answers.

* You watch your subscription emails or the reader and stand by for the follow up. When you see the Rantswers® coming, you return, immediately hit the ‘like’ button, and enjoy the asshattery.

* Rantswers® happens monthly, generally around mid-month. Or when I want. Or both.

* Serious questions, as noted above, are allowed but if you desire a sincere answer please indicate as such, or you’ll get a Rantswer®. They look the same but taste different.

This month, Rantswers® will close comments at some point on Sunday morning, 08 February 2015.  Email write-ins and late entries will be mocked, derided callously and urinated upon in printed form unless my ink cartridge is fucked.

Ready? Go!

For past Rantswers®, click this sentence!

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24 Responses to “Rantswers® 9.0”

  1. That frustrated little guy in front of the computer, there must have been someone spying on me in front of my computer 🙂

  2. to funny. I feel like that when I type notes at work!

  3. Why does everyone but New Englanders hate the New England Patriots?

  4. If they would have given the ball to Marshawn and he didn’t make it into the end zone…would Seahawk fans be saying that they should have passed the ball? And how do referees not notice that the Brady’s balls were a bit saggy for so long?

  5. We in the northeast are quickly running out of room to put all this snow. Solutions/suggestions/ideas. Please?

  6. staceymckennah Says:

    Reblogged this on Scribblings of a maniac and commented:
    Too funny and awesome

  7. Reblogged this on biancaasthoughtsaboutthings and commented:
    Too funny

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