Freak Ass Spam #3

As always, I’m more than willing to use the stupidity of others to generate entertainment for you all out there. That, and getting oddball spamments here at BrainRants is like being handed free material. Kind of like, I can take a day off from being creative and just punch that publish button. So on to the latest twisted digital driftwood that accumulates here on my needle-strewn beach:

From ‘Lily Miln 6’:Lucky for you that the Horde hate the Alliance again and that you get a chance to scratch their backs and they help scratch your�� s.” This is reminiscent of the ‘carrots coming to eat my position’ from #1. This also sounds like some fanfuck trashing either Star Wars or Star Trek… whichever… can’t we all just get along? And for the record, I require no ass-sistance scratching my ass. And what’s with the question-diamonds?

From ‘sfsfsdfgsdgdg’:   “dfhdfghdfghdfghdfghdfghdfgbncvncvbnvcbncvbncvbn” You know, it really, really awesome that epileptics can finally access the fucking interwebs. Too bad they can’t easily spell out ‘p-o-r-n’ like the rest of us. Shame, really.

Learn more about Lucas: Who the hell is Lucas? I knew a Lucas in gradeschool. He was one of those ’emotionally challenged’ kids who would lose his rabbit-assed mind if he spilled his milk and pitch an epic fit. That, or take it out on you and attempt to bitchslap you somewhere into next week.

Fun and gag: Another one with endless possibilities. Many of those I would be completely opposed to personally exploring, so no clicky for you, fuckwit.

Led TV: At first I assumed that this was just an ad for a new television, but then it occurred to me that possibly, in the spirit of Led Zepplin, a new and exciting dope-smokin’ music group is forming. I will have to watch the news…

Beretta 9mm: Put me in a dress and call me Shirley. Finally, spam I can really, really use. There’s nothing like the feel of a good automatic handgun in your grip, one that you’ve trained on and is easy to use to you as pointing your finger and making someone’s face expl… uh, never mind. You get the point.

Movie star planet: Oh… My… God… Quite possibly my worst fucking nightmare, people. Imagine being trapped on a world full of effete, dissociated, douchebag, self-important, Democrat/Libtard, big-mouthed, overpaid, undereducated, questionably-sexual fucktards. These people get paid, in essence, to pretend to be someone else. The rest of us either get committed or have to get therapy for doing that. I except Gary Sinise from this diatribe. He is righteous.

From somewhere in Poland: “greetings, your internet site is discount. I do thank you for work” For some reason I feel like a three-dollar whore. Not saying that’s a bad thing here…

I’m not really clear inside my own head as to what about all this crap scares me more: the content of the shit I get, or the notion that somewhere there’s a person sending this shit around. Or at least making a spambot to do it.

24 Responses to “Freak Ass Spam #3”

  1. As Johnny Rotten told a crowd of heckling Oklahoma cowboys: “I’m not here for your entertainment, you’re here for mine!”

  2. Good point about Lucases. Or is that Lucii? “Luke”s, on the other hand, always seem to have their shit together.

  3. ”dfhdfghdfghdfghdfghdfghdfgbncvncvbnvcbncvbncvbn”

    You find this weird?

  4. Hibiscus seeds, best carrot cake ever and by the way your site isn’t utilizing google the way it should.

  5. Hey, what’s with all the eyeball closeups in the “like” icons up there? I felt like I was being watched while I was clicking the ‘like’ button. Sheesh.

  6. Sorry to torch your Hindenburg, but Led TV was probably for TVs using Light-Emitting Diodes, hence Led TV. 😦
    Fun and gag? Definitely worth exploring! 😉
    And when am I gonna convince you that a 9mm round is worthless? Go .45 ACP, or better yet, the Belgian (I think) 5.7mm used in the PDW they call the P-90. These go through non-trauma plate body armour REALLY well. You gotta go big – unless you’re gonna cap somebody in the head, Mafia-style. Then you use a .22 Short – it doesn’t have enough energy to go clean through the skull, it just goes in one side and bounces around, literally scrambling the brain.
    (Don’t worry too much, I think I got that from CSI. Or my Chicago roots, I can’t remember which. 😀 )

  7. Beretta 9mm is my personal sidearm. Wouldn’t trade it for anything. Oh, and as far as movie stars go, Dwight Schultz (the original Murdock) is pretty awesome too. His daughter is even a Marine.

  8. whiteladyinthehood Says:

    hhmmm…I finally got some “freaky searches” – have you ever been mean to the avon lady…(shocked and appalled – I’d never be mean to the avon lady..haha) and my personal favorite – big, big, big, big (yes, 4 damn bigs) white lady fighting…(I don’t get a lot of crazy spams, though)

  9. Please take over the world with the Byronic Man. I will do your bidding!

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