Miss Clarkson’s Song – An Open Letter

Okay, so I built up enough pre-emptive hate about our National Anthem that I figured it would be in good character to publicly thank Ms. Kelly Clarkson for not fucking up our National Anthem. I will actually sleep better tonight for that. Thank you, Kelly. You’ looked smokin’ hot…

Dear Ms. Kelly,

Thank you so much for not destroying our National Anthem. Had you screwed it up, I would likely have departed on a five-state murder spree. My victims thank you, as do their children. I thought you looked lovely. You and I could possibly have children unless Katy Perry calls me first. Let me know, as donating DNA is quite easy. Just saying.

– Becoming your fan,

-Brain Rants

Finally!

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24 Responses to “Miss Clarkson’s Song – An Open Letter”

  1. I thought she did helluva job… class act.

  2. Modonna just friggin disappeared . Where the hell did she go?

  3. And she looked elegant, I like how they introduced her .. very classy. Well done her. (cos damn it’s a hard song to sing!)

  4. I told you she wouldn’t screw it up. I thought she did awesome!

  5. Why would you go on a 5 state killing spree instead of just focusing on her? Just wondering…

  6. I thought about you when she took the stage! I, too, thought she looked beautiful and did a wonderful job.

  7. whiteladyinthehood Says:

    Too funny…(I would imagine that anyone that reads your posts realizes you have an unwavering sense of patriotism and therefore set the bar very high! which is a very nice and rare thing) I’m glad you didn’t think she fucked it up.

  8. Still wish they’d let a military member and/or band perform it every year. I can dream.

  9. John Erickson Says:

    “Murdur” spree? Is that just an accidental misspelling, or are you trying to duck the online police again? (If so, you were better off with the “evidence elimination” euphemism. 😉 )

  10. I thought of you while she was singing hoping you find it just fine lol. I thought she did a great job and nailed the ending.

  11. You are right – we were all worried

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