I Got Mail

In case you have thought that I’ve been a bit… over the top in my Rants and comments, my apologies. I’ve been distracted by stuff out there on the horizon that was rolling this way. Like the guy on the TV news StormCastFive with the LiveDoppler who cheerfully informs you that the mother of all gully-washers is headed your way. Might be here in a week or so. Possibly severe!Β Side note: Midwesterners, Kansans in particular, will understand that everything here is possibly severe, mainly to folks in trailer parks.

For those of you who might sit and imagine that the sound of your life redirecting violently might sound a lot like crushing sheet steel and shattering safety glass, a church organ refrain, or the sound of tiny lungs trying on air for the first time, I’d completely agree with you on “all the above.” I’d also add that on occasion it sounds like the Windows VistaΒ ‘you just got email’ sound (in my cubicle, assclown; you don’t think I’d willingly use Vista at home, do you?):

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED
Caveats: NONE
Sir, the Army G3 will cut the RFO to Leavenworth.
Should only take a few weeks (at worst) to get all the
details. VR
-- Guy
Guy N. Pentagon
Comm: 502-555-5555
DSN: 312-555-5555
-----Original Message-----
From: Rants, Brain LTC MIL USA
Sent: Tuesday, November 15, 2011 9:01 AM
To: Pentagon, Guy N MAJ MIL USA
Subject: FW: Summer Cycle Moves (UNCLASSIFIED)
Classification: UNCLASSIFIED
Caveats: NONE
Guy,
Thanks for the week to mull this one over.
I will take your offer on the NTMA tasker.
Please forward information about this.
It will help keep the natives less restless here.
LTC BrainRants
Chief, C2 Branch
Ft. Leavenworth

Happy Anniversary, Baby.

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57 Responses to “I Got Mail”

  1. Your post was at the top of my ‘Tag Surfer’ section in the Dashboard. That’s almost as good as being freshly pressed.

    No such thing as an OTT rant really, not unless you are Attila the Hun complaining about needing a larger empire.

  2. Ahahaha! πŸ˜› *points and laughs* about vista .

    Congratulations otherwise !

  3. savorthefolly Says:

    eh? can you provide a translation?

  4. I thought people from Kansas were called Kansassian.
    I’m with Savor- are you still going to blog when you’re gone?
    And do I get to come to your going away party?

  5. Oh shit ! I didn’t really get that , so I was like , sure , congratulations . :-/ .

    I really do wish you keep it up. How long is it for ? Actually I have a truckload of questions….. Big post about it soon?

  6. Well, crap. I was going to say something cheerful, but this news makes me sad, which is selfish, I know. But, you gotta do what you gotta do, and I appreciate your service to our country. So…Soldier On! I do wish you the best, be safe, and please keep in touch with all of us civilians when you can. We’re all in this together, as Red Green says.

    On a side note, my nephew’s currently in basic training for the Navy. Just started on the 8th. He’ll then go to San Antonio for Master At Arms training, and then might join you Over There. If you have any advice for him, I’ll pass along to my sis.

  7. Becoming Bitter Says:

    Take care of yourself BrainRants and no, none of your rants were over the top. Each rant was you – funny, witty, and of course sarcastic. Just please take care of yourself. I hope that you remain safe, sound, and ranting.

  8. I thought the whole point was to be over the top!

  9. Best of luck with the upcoming tour. We’ll leave the cyber light on for ya!

  10. Hmm…I might have to put together a Ranteriffic carepackage. Good luck, God Speed, and Duck When Appropriate πŸ˜‰

  11. Ummm…not sure how to proceed. Keep safe. Rant on!

  12. what kind of email.

  13. I saw Leavenworth and thought, “Ya! I love Leavenworth!” (The best Bavarian town in the west!) but then read farther along for your “translation” and thought…”Oh….Afghanistan is definitely NOT Leavenworth…” http://www.leavenworth.org/

    Best of luck on your next endeavor and we all hope you keep this blog thing rolling. Do you actually get to DRIVE those tankers around in the DESERT now? Would love a video of you blowing something up.

  14. savorthefolly Says:

    Brainrants, not exactly sure when you leave but before you do, or when you get there you’ll have to let us all know where we can send care packages – and also what kinds of things you’d most like to receive. πŸ™‚

  15. That just sucks. Well, there will surely be plenty to rant about there.Keep safe.

  16. Congratulations! Or dammit. Both probably apply.

  17. John Erickson Says:

    I know it’s your job, my friend, so I’ll just wish you safe travels and a safe and sound return. And if they try to stick you with cheap body armour, I’ll happily send you my chainmail. Doesn’t do diddley against AK fire, but it will turn debris nicely.
    And do please let us know how to send you goodies, and what you might need (or want). Gotta keep our LTC happy! πŸ˜€

  18. As Hotspur says, both apply. Good to hear that the rants will continue, even if at a reduced rate. Never OTT! For guys like that dickwad yesterday, probably not ranty enough.

    Go do what most can’t, and some won’t, even though it’s necessary.

    My daughter decided today that I will start a blog of my own. C’mon John E, if I can do it, any idiot can. There’s already proof of that. It will never be as nutritious as yours, but with you as a guiding light, I might be able to fill a small part of the hole.

    When I registered, I found that there is already someone on WordPress listed as Archon. I ain’t him (or her, as the case may be). I need to go find out what (s)he is all about. I’ll be listed as ArchonsDen. Visit at your own risk, but I’ll love to see you all.

    And remember about the care package information. Even if we send you too much, I’m sure you’ll share. I was going to send a care package of potatoes to KayJai, but she don’t know how to cook them.

  19. Man, that bites. 😦

    Be safe, come home in one piece, and definitely shout out where to send care packages … I’ll bet it’s a little easier to get them through if it’s from “family”. Thanks for being you and doing the job you do. *hugs*

  20. Wow, this is a bit of a shocker! I feel like I’m now waiting for one of my own boys to be deployed. Just know that there’s this reader (and many, many more) out here following your journey and waiting for the letters…er, ‘rants’ home. Stay safe and ‘duck when appropriate.’

  21. Sorry you are having another “detour” in your life. How’s Di taking this?

  22. Only response needed is thus…(follow the link please, I promise it’s not a Savor/John E. sex tape ;D)…

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