Random Thought #20

I hate it when my socks get old and lose their stretchy, elastic goodness. When this happens, they stay up for about fifteen purposeful steps, then crumple around the tops of my boots in a defeated green pile.

This feels weird, like I’m walking around with my pants down, but not.

And why does washing them make the dysfunctional ones undetectable again? Then I inevitably pair a good sock with a fail-sock.

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54 Responses to “Random Thought #20”

  1. You lead a complicated life, man.

  2. …..and I thought I had troubles.

  3. Okay, I probably ought to have added that I’m ranting about my military socks, and that they are always worn under the pants. Out of uniform I generally have no use for socks.

    • I’m with you. I have no use for socks . . . which tend to be the most badly behaved, ill-trained part of our wardrobe:

      Socks have relationship issues.
      They tend to go AWOL or MIA in the laundry.
      And, as you’ve noted, they fall down on the job.

  4. I’ve got my boots on, and one sock trying to crawl down past my heel.
    Thank you for giving voice to an issue that plagues us all and has been ignored far too long.

  5. You should have a follow up rant to describe the usefulness of a fallen sock. For one, I think they make wonderful shop rags once their purpose of foot support has expired!

  6. Don’t you like the scrunch sock? You could start a new trend as an 80’s military man.

  7. What you need to do is buy the socks I wore as a cheerleader. They stop at the ankles and have cute little pom poms on the back. I’d send you the ones I have, but I doubt you wear a size 2.

  8. savorthefolly Says:

    I feel the same way, except about my boobs.

  9. I hate holes in the heel. I like the old man feel. OK, not really!

  10. Send them to John so he can give them to Blackjack.

  11. I hate when that happens with my ankle socks, then they’re only half way on my feet. :-(.

  12. mkultra76 Says:

    I have a hole in the big toe of my knee-high rainbow striped toe socks. I share your sock woes. πŸ˜‰

  13. My elastic is still stretchy. The only reason my “socks” touch my “boots” is because they’re so incredibly large. You get what I’m saying here? Is that euphemism clear enough? I am well endowed in the sock department. I need a huge sock drawer just to hold all the socks.

  14. Well, people who work at Foot Locker do have foot jobs.

  15. Becoming Bitter Says:

    Same exact problem at my house. I usually mismatch the socks too, but I don’t bother sorting anything out because I’m too lazy. Your blog name is awesome. By the way feel free to stop by my blog. An opinion from an experienced blogger would be nice.

  16. Saw a cartoon this week. Caption says “Another dimension”. Alien unloading a dryer. Big pile of unmatched socks. Alien says, “Where did these things come from??”

    Zanesville, Ohio was started by Zane Grey’s (something)great-grandfather in1791. Zane’s mom was a female of the clan who married a guy named Grey, but wanted to keep the clan name going, so she gave it to him as a surname.

    I’ve been there two or three times to knife shows. If you’re in the area, get off the interstate and drive thru the town on the old highway. On the west edge of town they have a three-ended, Y-shaped bridge. The river pulls a big oxbow and, halfway around, another tributary flows in. Looks like a big Y, so they built another concrete Y out from all three promontories and put a traffic light in the center. You get halfway across and have to hang a sixty degree turn. The light for the highway stays green unless someone comes down the sideroad. Or look at it by sat-photo on Google maps.

  17. LisaaLinh Says:

    The dryer eats my socks all the time 😦

    • My dryer doesn’t, but somehow they get de-paired and desynchronized over several loads. Which means it takes five loads of laundry to finally consolidate all the socks that started in the first load.

  18. lol.. I know exactly what how you feel! Socks shelf-life is pretty much 6 months.

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